The Coachella Lineup Is Lit AF

Time to start flirting with your molly plug again: The Coachella lineup was released on January 3, and its so fucking awesome Im reconsidering my hatred of the festival. On one hand, Coachella is literally just an excuse for people (read: teenagers) to Instagram pics of themselves in a crochet bikini and say they stood kind of near Kylie Jenner in line for a stupid ferris wheel.

On the other hand, post- Beyonc is gonna be there this year. Can you see my problem here?

A bajillion artists are going to be at the festival, but according to my totally objective ranking, the important ones are Beyonc, Beyonc, Kendrick Lamar, Beyonc, Marshmello (holla at my EDM betches), Gucci Mane, and Beyonc. I guess people are excited about Radiohead and Lorde too. For some unknown reason, the lineup also includes Hans Zimmer, a 59-year-old German film composer. I had no fucking clue who he was, but apparently The Chainsmokers are stoked about his concert?

After an extensive investigationaka two seconds of Googlingit looks like he did the soundtracks for movies like and , so obvs all the celeb TTHs are going to be there so they look cultured for the paparazzi. But like, I guess rolling to thesoundtrack could be kind of cool. Or terrifying. Hard to tell.

Anyway, dont get too excited about the lineup unless you bought a ticket already, because theyre hella sold out. Betches with tickets, start dieting right the fuck now, because that Beyonc concert selfie will be the most important pic youll take in your entire life.

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